Paulie Is Calling His Troops

Apr 24, 2020 Diary entry: Paulie would like to take this time to salute his loyal and faithful readers, his true audience members who are famished beasts with sharp teeth and gleaming fangs which they use to tear and devour the flesh of truth and wisdom, they eat it up blood, hair, guts, and all, none of it goes to waste, this conquering army of Paulie’s is small but tenacious, and we will most certainly take over the world, but the world is full of soft-toothed lollipop suckers whose brains are limp, soft and weak, you sugar babies don’t have the strength to cross the street if they were giving away free suckers, you eat up every form of candy from the candy counter but you won’t eat one goddamned carrot or stalk of celery, you shun anything that is good for you, “Oh Mommy, make the bad man with wisdom go away!”, “I can’t think when he is around”, all we can say here at Diary Headquarters is “Roll over and put the first thing in your mouth and suck on it”; we have threatened, cajoled, and bribed you, but we cannot get you to open your minds to anything real or truthful, it’s like we’re speaking a foreign language, you just don’t get it and you don’t want it, our fine chefs spend hours working over the hot stove to bring you fine meals served with expensive china and silverware set on fresh pressed white linen tablecloths, and you won’t remove the lollipops from your mouths to eat, maybe we need to start serving all you sugar babies animal crackers and juice boxes at the little table in the rec room, just move you on out of the way of the adults whose table conversation involves more than cartoons and fairy tales of your latest exploits in the toy room, anyway, we have still not given you up completely, there is still room in the ranks for anyone who wants to be all they can be, all our soldiers crawled before they marched, and you can march too, alongside other conquering soldiers whose minds are as tough as their calluses, reveille is at 5:00 AM every morning, if you wish to join us, fall out and fall in, we march at dawn…

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