Life Is A Beautiful Imperfect Dream

Jan 19,2020 Diary entry: Hey everybody, it’s Paulie, I was over at a friend’s house last night playing cards, he has a talking dog, a big dog like an Irish setter, but his hair is all fluffy-like, very plush, and he is light brown in color, and he has the nicest dog breath, it smells like my wife’s beef casserole, he’s the nicest dog you’d ever meet, he speaks in such a polite manner that you just want to cry and cuddle him and not let go, he asked me how my life was, whether I was happy being a human, if I had any unfulfilled goals, my likes and my dislikes, anyway, I was talking with the dog and trying to shuffle the cards at the same time, I kept getting the cards wrong side up and was getting them sorted out when the dog said his master was shooting me a dirty look, “He’s so impatient and he angers easily” the dog said, I replied to the dog, “Like when you crap on the patio?”, the dog said “Yeah, just like that”, I commiserated with the dog and told him “It’s no big deal, all they have to do is get a dustpan and sweep it up”, the dog said “Tell me about it, when you gotta go, you just want to go”, I asked the dog if they ever punish him and he said they are always threatening him with jail, “The kennel?” I asked, he said”Yeah”, I said that the kennel must be a very harsh place for such a nice well-mannered dog such as he, the dog replied “It’s horrifying”, so I asked about the conditions, what it is like being incarcerated at such a place, I asked “Do they have pictures of runaway dogs on the walls?”, “Are there humans there also, like small time flea and tick men, annoying duck call salesmen, cross eyed groomers?”, I sensed fear and angst in this sweet dog’s big brown eyes, and a small tear ran down his fluffy brown face, he said he felt like he could come to love me like a brother, he said I understood him and he sensed I was one of his own, anyway, we talked and laughed all through the night, it turns out he has won awards for his exceptional grammar skills, I may see if he will collaborate with me on my writing, as I flunked both grammar and English Lit in school, the dog said my primary problem was just nerves, he said if I would only relax, writing would be as easy as scratching fleas while rolling around on a dead skunk, well, I think I met my new best friend, I would love for him to be my phone pal but he can’t work the key pad, well, all our friends have their shortcomings, there is no perfect thing in this world, that’s how it was designed, perfection lacks life and luster, a perfect person or a perfect dog would be no more than a lifeless robot, so I pour out a large martini and I toast an imperfect world and all it has given me, shalom everybody, shalom…

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