An Empty Cookie Jar, Unaccountable Expenses, And Fasces

Aug 13, 2020 Diary entry: As some of you already know, Paulie Gee’s Realtime Diary is shutting down for good, it has been all over the news, we have done all we can do, we have given all the advice we can give, we have told all the jokes that are fit to tell, we are tapped out like a wine bottle at a hobo party, we are empty like your mother’s cookie jar when she has gone out shopping, we are spent, depleted, and we are tired, the auditors are asking questions that I can’t answer, anyway, although we are working with a skeleton crew, there are more people around here than ever, our laid off and discharged employees spend more time here now than they did when they were working, and I have stacks of unauthorized bills on my desk to prove it, why does a diary company need an open account at Fred’s Fine Furnishings, here’s a bill from Lee Wei’s Karate Studio, and here’s a six hundred dollar bill from Aunt Sue’s Aromatherapy Emporium, how am I going to explain these expenditures to the investigators, hang on a second, I have to use the intercom, “Bzzzz”, “Click”, “Yes Mr. Paulie”?, “Yes, Madge, I want to see Jason in my office immediately, whenever he gets back from wherever it is he went”, “Yes Mr. Paulie”, “Oh, and Madge, coffee”, “Right away Mr. Paulie”, now where was I, “Bzzzz”, “Click”, “Yes Madge”?, “Mr. Paulie, there’s a man out here who says he wants to see you”, “I can’t be disturbed right now”, “But he is an auditor, and he says it’s important”, “Tell him I’m not in”, “But he can hear you speaking over the intercom”, “Tell him I’m on the intercom out in the warehouse”, “Yes Mr. Paulie”, now where was I, oh yeah, I was somewhere in town, I don’t remember where, but there were a lot of stupid people around, and I was explaining to them that our American nation has been a fascist state since it’s inception, well, they were very plainly taken aback at my announcement, I explained that the symbol of the fasces is everywhere in America, in the Senate building, the House of Representatives, on the Lincoln memorial, you see it everywhere you look, well, when such a statement is made, thoughtful and intelligent and responsible people will question your assertion every time, and the question I received was “What are fasces”, I tell you, if water were brains, we’d all have dried up and blew away, I’m living in Grand Central Dumbass Station, the Crossroads of Dumbass America, I think all the dumbest tourists from all over the world came to view my town during it’s glory days and never left, we’ve been dumbed down so far that there is nowhere to go but up, unfortunately, we don’t know what direction that is, well, there is a lot of noise coming from the crowd down in the break room, I guess I’ll go join the fun, but before i go, let me say to all of you, from all of us, although the animals can be frustrating, you gotta still love them, we wish everyone love and peace during these most exceptional days in which we live, Shalawam…

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One thought on “An Empty Cookie Jar, Unaccountable Expenses, And Fasces

  1. Ah….I just came across you on Facebook a few days ago. I was checking your Facebook page and enjoying what I was seeing and reading. It led me here! I am so sorry that you have experienced this trouble. While I enjoyed reading this article, it made me sad but also gave me hope. You and all your workers did your best during very trying, difficult times. I wish you each all the best as you venture on this journey called, LIFE. May Yahuah richly bless you and keep you now and forever! Shalom

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