Signpost Up Ahead

Diary entry: Paulie had been on the road all night, heading back to the city after a long weekend in the country with the family, as I sipped cold gas station coffee, I could see through tired eyes the signpost up ahead that read “Dumb Ass Town-Three More Miles”, we were almost home at last, our turnoff, “Dip Shit Drive” would be coming up on the right, then a quick jog and we’d be near the old homestead on “Lame Ass Lane”, where the dogs can pee, Goober can throw up his mustard sardines he ate en route, and I can check the mail and unwind a pent up weekend spent in a leaky tent scratching a strange-looking rash and letting my dog Smudge out every twenty minutes to crap because he ate a skunk or something that disagreed with his usually iron clad bowels, anyway, it’s always good to be back home, no matter where home is, well, this is Paulie, home where he belongs and where he loves it, saying shalom…

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