Skunky Beer With Too Many Bubbles, Grass Skirts, And Moon Debris

May 18, 2020 Diary entry: Paulie judges a man by his smile, a man’s smile can tell stories, if a man farts every time he smiles, Paulie smells a rat, Paulie will not deal with such a man, there are too many fish in the sea that have integrity, to waste time with a gassy blow fish that ate a spoiled worm sandwich for lunch and washed it down with skunky beer that was brewed up in some animals large intestine and dispensed through a brown charge hole, with way too many bubbles in it, oh god, I gotta make a move out of this place, but I don’t know where to go, I just want to run and scream, well, maybe I’ll mix up a pitcher of something and cloud up the office, and make an escape through the fog, maybe I can run through the hazy countryside, swim some rivers, and come out on another side of this thing, possibly reach that beautiful green valley on the other side of the mountain where barefoot ladies in grass skirts carry bamboo trays of delicacies you have never known, and colorfully-sailed junks lazily move through the ocean waves in their sleep, and the salty sea breeze kisses you lovingly and rubs your nose like a soft puppy that only wants to love, yeah, I gotta get out of this sterilized and washed-out city where all life comes to die, maybe I’ll just catch a bus to Terre Haute and visit my cousin who runs a semi-failing hog operation just outside of town by where the power plant blew up last fall, hang on, I’ve just been handed a type written report, there is news breaking as we speak, it seems China has landed on the rear side of the moon again, what deviltry are they up to now, what could they possibly be doing back there, with all the trips China has made to the moon, you’d think they could be a good neighbor and clean up the golf clubs and other crap that the Apollo astronauts left behind, and all of Buzz Aldrin’s Moon Pie wrappers and empty beer cans he scatters wherever he goes, it’s been leaked that Russian cosmonauts raked up some of America’s moon debris which included Alan Shepard’s underpants, they identified them as such by a label that read “If you find my underpants, please return them to earth, Sheppie”, well, that’s it for tonight, I’m headed down to the gas station to pick up road maps, this is Paulie sending out a full moon missile of love directly to the people of earth, shalom…


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