Paulie Won’t Tell His Joke

May 16, 2020 Diary entry: Now Paulie is surely a humble man and he knows why the world is such as it is for him, but the forest is getting kind of bare these days, what was once a lush and beautiful thing, full of every kind of plant and animal that was good for food, well, there isn’t much left in that once-glorious bread basket, only a few crumbs that jog your memory back to the good days; the only thing the forest produces these days, are a few scrawny chipmunks for the fry pan, boiled thistle pods, and the occasional wild mushroom that you don’t care whether it’s okay to eat, or poisonous, it really doesn’t matter any more, anyway, Paulie knows why the world is in the state it’s in and he understands, that is why Paulie never fears or worries, Paulie will carry on as usual, he will carry his joke diary high and proud, and Paulie will laugh as the whole world cries because a great shining mountain has risen up in his heart, Paulie has glimpsed his end, and it is his beginning, Paulie would like to clue you all in to the thing you need to laugh at your adversity, but most of you are so deep into Fairy Land that you will never escape, you love your fantasies way too much, your so-called political leaders who are simple actors reading a script, your priests and pastors who are simply rereading a tired old script, your teachers who are simply reciting the same old tired lies, you even love your dead presidents and throw them parties as if they were seated at your table sharing the cherry pie you baked just for them, what the hell is wrong with you retards, there is this new thing called the internet where you can get answers to any question, don’t you people have any questions besides whether Chloe is gonna marry her brother’s gay boyfriend on the afternoon soap opera, or whether Tom Hank’s and his wife/husband really has that virus that I guess comes from kissing goats, and I don’t mean on the mouth, or whether your favorite sports guy will manage to survive with a ten million or twenty million dollar raise because it will keep him quiet and he won’t tell the world that all pro sports are rigged before any season ever begins, well, Paulie says to those who care not about truth, you who think all dogs go to heaven, you couldn’t describe that farcical place if your lives depended on it, you have no knowledge of truth and you never will, the only advice Paulie can give to most of you is tighten up that mask and tighten up your rectum because you got some shit comin’ you won’t like, and no, that was not the fourth rectum joke in the series of rectum jokes leading up to our Summer Rectum Joke Extravaganza, well, Paulie had a funny story to tell you about the near sighted camper who thought he had a chipmunk in his fry pan but it turned out to be something else entirely, but Paulie isn’t in the mood anymore, he is disgusted with the human race, you all got flat tires and blown engines, this is Paulie, shalom…


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