Choose Your Words More Carefully

Apr 18, 2020 Diary entry: Paulie met a wonderful German lady last week down at the Neubenflabin Bar and Grill during their-all-you-can-eat Weinerschnitzel Night; after several bottles of wine and more plates of weinerschnitzel than I care to divulge here, I told her that her face looked like mist that fell from above, she threw a plate of cabbage in my face and said she never wanted to see me again, and that she was gonna have her cousin Schneiderbundt break my legs, how was I to know that mist means dung in German, I have never done well with the foreign ladies, there really are language barriers that keep people apart, no one knows that better than me, don’t even try dating a Macedonian lady, I found that out the hard way, anyway, this question everyone is asking during these last days about whether the Anti-Christ is gonna be a male or a female, well, Paulie can tell you that the Anti-Christ will most definitely be a man because Paulie dated the female Anti-Christ and she went back to Germany to live with her folks, this whole modern dating scene is Bravo Sierra, if you know what I mean, I think maybe this new online dating could catch on someday, if you accidentally insult your date, she can’t throw her drink at you from her terminal in Butte Flat Kentucky, I don’t know, the world just seems to be getting bigger every day, but why do I feel as though it is closing in on me, Paulie’s questions only fall on deaf ears these days, I guess they are questions for the ages, and the answers are not for Paulie, well, there is no questioning Paulie’s love for you all, it remains unquestionable, shalom…

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