Please Let The Doctor Through

Apr 12, 2020 Diary entry: “Get back, get back everybody, I’m a doctor!”, well, I didn’t go to medical school, but I played a doctor on the stage, I starred in our fifth grade revival of Snow White and The Seven Dwarves, I played Doc, and when I gave Sleeping Beauty the kiss of life, I kissed my acting career good bye, I had a flashback to last years rewritten Sleeping Beauty play where I played the doctor who was in love with the leading lady, she was Imogene Thornton, the prettiest girl in school, I learned I wasn’t supposed to ad lib during a school play like Jackie Gleason always did during his smash performances, I approached our leading lady during the intense love scene where I tell her that the enemy is quickly approaching the castle, and that we will soon be doomed, and I threw her on the floor, telling her I’d always dreamt of this moment, then the director cut me from the play because there wasn’t supposed to be a love scene, anyway, the first time I faked my death and people found out I was still alive, I told them I was a doctor and I saved my life and that they had me to thank for it, I was like an Irish kamikaze pilot in those days who had an unslakable Cambian thirst for whatever life offered, and I needed a doctor on staff because the world didn’t understand me or my ways, I was an alien in my own home town, after being fake dead for only a little over a month, people had forgotten me and no one even recognized me anymore, I had lost my AMA accreditation to practice medicine after I tried to open Imogene Thornton’s trachea the old fashioned way after she looked like she was going to faint because I told her my Irish lesbian joke in my rarely used special Welsh accent; I was cited for practicing off-the-books procedures in an off manner, so I figured I’d need a new profession in my new world where no one knew or remembered me, I decided to become a professional adviser; I opened up a little shop in a garage down off Melbourne Avenue, I was soon swamped with customers, it seemed the whole town was in need of advice, people lined up outside my office to hear my wisdom and advice, and they paid me handsomely for it, I was beginning to fly high once more, and the rest is history, history they should teach in public school instead of all the lies and other crap nobody wants to hear anymore, well, Paulie the doctor says to any who will listen, “Open wide and drink this”, shalom all…

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