An Ex’ed Out Xmas

Diary entry: Yeah, it’s the Christmas season once more, although Paulie no longer celebrates Christmas, he does have memories of Christmas’es past and he would like to share them with you during this most festive time of year, Paulie remembers his young childhood like it was a Christmas past that happened only yesterday, every year Dad would put on his Santa suit and pretend to be Santa Claus; we would make the rounds through the snowy wonderland of Farmington and Dad would regale all with stories and little candies he passed out to every passerby, then after Mother died, Dad would get drunk at Christmas, put his Santa suit on, and tell us kids to get in the goddamned car because we were gonna celebrate like it was the last Christmas, not the first Christmas, we always went out to the county orphanage and Dad would read seasonal stories to the orphans but he always ended up telling the same old story about an Oriental prostitute he knew while he was in the navy, then he’d give cigarettes out to the children and either pass out or get in a wreck on the way home, one year Dad gave me a real revolver with a flashlight attachment on it, he told me to go stand in front of the mirror and check my mouth for loose fillings, everybody loved my dad but his Christmastime drinking was beginning to sour the eggnog if you know what I mean, one year Dad was hitching Rudolf up to the sleigh, actually it was the neighbor’s dog he was trying to get to pull his Oldsmobile out of the ditch, Dad said Rudolf was getting too old to do his job anymore and he shot him with a flare gun he kept in the trunk, Rudolf’s nose wasn’t the only thing that lit up that Christmas, well, every time Christmas rolled around and that ratty old Santa Claus suit came out of the closet, we knew we were in for another “holly, jolly, fucked up by golly” Christmas, anyway, this is Paulie hoping your little Christmas is whatever it is you think it is, shalom to all the family during this most regular time of year, again, shalom…

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