Corporate Chaos

Diary entry: Well, as stated previously, it was bound to happen, the sweet, simple, homespun “Diary” has grown exponentially these past few months into a large corporate entity now called Paulie Gee’s Realtime Diary Corporation Inc., I don’t know most of the people around here, people are walking quickly through hallways with ear buds, carrying stacks of computer paper, some are running with laptops, many, if not most, are standing or milling around sucking out of lidded coffee containers and wiping powdered sugar from their faces, nodding at each other as if it were a form of communication, some kid just asked me if I’d seen his dog, well, it’s almost noontime, I’m gonna head to the office for a martini and an egg salad sandwich from the machine, but first, a quick stop at our personnel office to grab some records of new hires, our man who heads up Personnel is one of our most valued employees, he’s a seventeen year old high school dropout we happened to pick up at our last job fair, I keep asking him to let his hair grow out, at least enough to cover the tattoo on the side of his head, it’s kind of eerie looking, I keep telling him we have certain standards and he keeps answering that we don’t, then, I guess this happens with large corporations, the people just have to take sides, it doesn’t matter what it is, people want to be on one side or the other, our Christian techies want a wall built in the break room to separate the Muslim techies, the Republican dataphiles want us to come up with the money to build a wall to separate the Democrats whom they refer to as “communist infiltrators”, UFO experts won’t accept UFO deniers, we even have coffee drinkers bitching about tea drinkers, they want to throw them all in the lagoon over behind the waste plant ala the Boston Tea Party, after my martini and egg salad sandwich, I’ll head on down to Finance to see where we can come up with wall money, but I think first, I’ll call another meeting to go over our latest “No Religion-No Politics” guidelines for “Diary” entries, we live in the midst of a Christian nation and we do not want to rile the local Christian community, as they can be quite critical of thought when it becomes too free, one must always respect the norm, you don’t go in to the middle of an Indian reservation and shout out that Geronimo couldn’t suck General Custard’s pudding for Christ’s sake, we won’t rile the indigenous Christians either, our “No Religion-No Politics” stance will be strictly enforced, Paulie is not crazy, no matter what two psychiatrists and a pretty, dark haired nurses assistant says, she enticed Paulie with her sick, twisted psycho babble, her seductive magic overcame Paulie, Paulie will be vindicated, well, as Paulie sits in his darkened office, with the vodka flowing and the corporate chaos ebbing, Paulie says shalom my people…

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